Sunday, April 26, 2009

A letter to my future daughter in Law.

Dear future daughter in law (or dil for short),

The day has come that you will marry the man of your dreams
and now my baby boy has a new woman in his life. Here are some things you might like to know about the person who swept you off your feet.

He's a big eater, so you better learn to cook and cook large amounts of it. He likes big Rib Eyes (cooked medium well) and mashed potatoes and corn on the cobb. Also he eats fast, so keep it coming.

He smacks sometimes. (Yes this is his one main annoying habit. ) Hes so adorable otherwise, so learn to live with it. Keep your fingers away from his mouth, or you could loose one!

He will mow the lawn only about the 3rd time you ask. So get the first two times out of the way early, (like while the grass is still short) because by the third time, he'll sigh very loudly and then stomp out and finally do it.

When he gets mad at you you wont really know it, because he has very good self control. He'll most likely just ignore you and play video games if he is mad. He gets his good temperament from his mother. :-)

Hes pretty mild mannered and calm. He's very easy going, unless he has a goal and he does not rest until he accomplishes it. Be ready to help him achieve his goals, or there will be no Peace.

He is a Boxers type of guy. (No briefs for him, too constricting.) Buy him Boxers with crazy things on them, Bananas, Texas A&M logos, Bart Simpson, Golf balls, Batman, get the idea.

Hopefully he will have a good job because he likes the finer things in life. Top notch stereos, the best of clothing, tons and tons of athletic shoes. Designer closets, quality furniture, the best in cars.

He's always wanting to buy something expensive. And hes not afraid to work hard for it. Maybe you should have a good career too, so you'll both have plenty of money for these finer things. (This is the same boy who cried the first time he had to fly in "COACH" on a plane! He always flew first class and went and sat down in first class once and wouldn't get out until I pried his hands off the arm rests and pushed him into Coach. (He cried for the rest of the trip.)

Be prepared to be pampered like a princess. He's very thoughtful and will take you to movies, nice restaurants and do things you want to do just to make you happy. Consider yourself a VERY LUCKY GIRL.

Know in advance that he watches lots of sports. Football mostly, basketball, more football. You wont have control of the remote if hes home. Learn to deal with it.

He is a daredevil and loves adventure! He rides Rollercoasters, Travel, Snowboard, Scuba dive, Bungee jump, Go on cruises. There is nothing he is afraid of, The world is his playground and he'll try anything once!

Don't try to make him eat things he doesn't like (Which isn't much) He'll make it clear what he doesn't like. Just give him one small spoonful on his dinner plate and call it a "NO THANK YOU Portion" and he might taste it.

Chocolate is not safe in your house! Buy a safe, hide the combination, its your only hope .

He likes to sleep a lot. he will sleep till noon on weekends. Be prepared to make him go to bed before 10 or he will stay up all night, surfing the web, watching scary movies and playing video games. Just clap really loud or turn on the TV to cartoons and open the blinds. He'll get up eventually.

He gets good grades and learns things really fast. He seems to be annoyed when others don't "get it" as fast as he does. Most likely he will expect your children to make straight As. (Just remind him of when he had to "pull a card" in first grade for not listening to the teacher. He will pipe down after that.)

He loves dogs. He's allergic to cats. Get a really big DOG and be ready to take care of all its needs, except the playing part. He'll cover that part. However, he doesn't mind bathing it and blowing it dry it and talk sweet to it. "Who's my girl? You re my girl! Youre a pretty girl! Dats my Girl!"

He doesn't know how to hang up a bath towel. Just get over it and pick them up for him. You'll never change that part of him, believe me, Ive tried!

He gives the best Backrubs. Take advantage of that talent!

He gives the best big Bearhugs. But has an annoying habit of lifting you off the ground and shaking you just to see if he can make your back pop! (hes convinced this is good for you.)

He cares about living things. Animals, birds, especially baby anythings. But he will Stomp a spider into the ground in a New york second!

He loves the Lord, don't ever question his faith, He will fight you for it. Be ready to go to church every Sunday and Wednesday without fail. Its really important to him.

(he does have an annoying habit of loosing his bible. Just buy him a stock of several, have his name engraved in gold on them and wait till he tells you another is gone!)

He has a tender heart. Please be gentle with it.

With Much Love,
-your future over-bearing mother in-law (my apologies in advance) PS I expect at least 2 grandbabies to spoil!

This is him and I taken by the great JODIE GOODISON! It was taken in the summer o f 2009 and it was like 106 degrees here. Im not kidding.
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